I live in Washington State where it is fairly wet, and our rainy season is
just coming to an end now.

My neighbor wants to stain his fence, and I want to paint mine (although may
go for a Behr colored solid stain).

How long should we wait before we paint/stain? These fences were put up in
the rainy season and it has been raining on them regularly for a good few
months. He thinks a few days is okay, but I'm more comfortable waiting 4-5
weeks.

Also, along part of my fence is a vegetable garden. Should I put something
up so the fruit/vegetables do not touch the treated fence? Would it be
safer for me to paint or stain bearing in mind we'll be eating the produce
grown next to it?

The fences are starting to look "grey" and we want to preserve them as best
we can, but I'm particularly keen on having mine a lighter color.

Your suggestions are most appreciated.