madgardener wrote:
Well, I see that I have been rightfully accused and condemmed of
wrongfully posting in HTML and posting a JPG on this text
newsgroup. I have to say that I am not a selfish person, nor do I
think that anything I do or say is of importance. That I've
managed to step on the feelings and attitudes so very efficiently
lately shows me that I need to back off and retreat.

I am NOT saying this to get responses for me "not to leave!" I am
not asking for such things. It's really hard for me to lurk and
not respond to things because I truely enjoy and need to visit and
contribute to this newsgroup. I've been here for over seven years,
and despite that in the past, so many enjoyed my postings about my
fairy gardens and adventures about the cats, dogs and such, I think
that it has come time to pull out for awhile.

I can't seem to get anything right lately,and that isn't meant as
pity or blame or excuse. My job at Lowes doesn't have any schedule
that is consistant, or enough hours to make it worth my time to
drive not only myself to work which is only 14 miles one way, but
to take oldest son to another Lowes which is 47 miles away, one way.

I have close shifts all this week, and then next week, as a
wonderful thing, I have ALTERNATE days off. work, off, work, off,
work, off. This will make me slightly mad (as in crazy). Bad
enough I don't know sometimes if I'm coming or going with this job.
And I can't afford to just give notice and get another job. I am
still in an area where to quit a job that pays $7.80 an hour
(despite not getting or being allowed to work more than 27 hours)
is foolish when the alternative is work at a job that still won't
give me more hours and pay me minimum wages.

Getting back to my rudeness and irresponsibility........I never
meant to cause deletion of posts. I still grieve over the loss and
inability to retrieve my previous posts from years past when I
first came here. It's just a feeling, and eventually I'll get over
it.

But I will say that the people here (most of them, about 99%) have
kept me from major depression and given me a reason to not only
continue gardening, but to see the magic in every blossom and
textured leaf and Nature around me better. For what little bit
it's worth (and I hate to admit my weakness), I really DO care what
people think or say about me, meaning I guess after 52 years I
still have feelings despite years of verbal and emotional abuse.

Warren, Travis, Janet......I sincerely apologize for disrupting this
newsgroup. I had no idea how ****ed off or inconsiderate it was to
not only post in HTML or post a picture that I thought was awesome
for me to capture even for a novice like myself. You can be
assured you will not see me here for quite awhile and I will just
visit some of the garden neighborhood friends thru e-mail as I can.

As giving and generous and I have always been, to have been accused
of being selfish cuts pretty well. Despite just having to only
correct the problem, I think I need to back off for awhile and
despite that this is my most magical time of the year to share the
gifts of my 9 raised beds, it's just not right for me to assume
anything anymore. Bad enough that newsgroups are being dropped.
I only go to one. This one. That's been it (with rare exception to
alt.bianaries.pictures.gardens, which like I said, I never get to
see pictures I see remarks about anyway and seems to be a waste of
time, and I've posted there a few times.)

So with great emotion, I'll walk away. I'll possibly be back
before spring is over. I probably rely too much on this computer
and newsgroup anyway. Time to get back outside in the soil and dirt
and anything neat I want to share, I'll just send thru e-mail if I
get overcome by words.

Marilyn the madgardener, up on the ridge, back in Faerie Holler,
overlooking English Mountain in Eastern Tennessee, zone 7, Sunset
zone 36

I never intended to chase you or anyone else away. I was just trying to
be helpful. I enjoy reading your posts. Why can't you see the pix in
alt.binaries.pictures.gardens?

--

Travis in Shoreline (just North of Seattle) Washington
USDA Zone 8b
Sunset Zone 5