GardenBanter.co.uk - Dwarf citrus trees and gas

"Betsy Maverly" wrote
in message
. theremailer.net...
Last weekend I was caught in a most embarassing situation. I was
looking for dwarf citrus trees at a neighbourhood nursery and thought
I was alone in one of the aisles so, feeling gaseous, I looked around,
spied no other shoppers and decided to ever so slightly hike my leg up
and expel a long and high pitched fart. You see, earlier that morning
I had dined on coffee, boiled eggs, sausage and malted milk.
I should have known better. Much to my surprise, I discovered that I
had been heard by someone I hadn't seen. He had been bending down
looking at some Sweet Williams. How was I to know he was there all
along!
I know he heard me. I made a rye expression and looked down and
briskly walked away.
I heard him cough moments later so he must have walked into the cloud
that old toothless had just let loose. Being a lady of refined
qualities and delicate disposition it isn't in my nature to expel gas
in public. I hope I never see that man again.
Who can add to this?

Not to worry...
Said 'victim' most likely died of a heart attack
in his car out in the parking lot mere moments
later...