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OT ~ Halloween chortle
The watergardening labradors and I are great fans of author Dean Koontz and his golden retriever, Trixie. Every once and a while Trixie sends around an email letter to remind readers of a new book release. Today's email details Trixie's plans for Halloween. MY HALLOWEEN PLANS By Trixie Koontz, Dog Dress up like witch. Tour neighborhood. Fill bag with goodies. Return home. Dress up like Frankenpuppy. Tour neighborhood. Fill bag with goodies. Return home. Dress up like terrifying ET. Tour neighborhood, demand goodies or will kill with ray gun. Return home. Insert in mouth set of giant wax fangs, spray whipped cream on muzzle to fake rabies, chase neighborhood children who are trick-or-treating, terrify into dropping their bags of goodies. Snatch bag. Return home. Pee. Dress up like Lassie, go to bakery, convince everyone that Timmy is trapped under overturned tanker truck. Get everyone to leave bakery to help Timmy. Loot store. Experience moment of guilt. Chastise self: “Bad dog. Bad dog. Bad, bad dog.” Go to butcher shop. Convince everyone that Timmy is trapped in burning sawmill. Get everyone to leave butcher shop to help Timmy. Grab all the frankfurters and steaks. Experience a moment of guilt. Decide can live with it. Go home. Eat. Eat, eat, eat. Throw up. Write memoir of criminal activities. Sell to Bantam Books. Sell film rights to Steven Spielberg. Go on book and movie tour. Stay in 4-star hotels with room service. Order six dozen frankfurters every night. Go to Betty Ford clinic to take cure for serious frankfurter addiction. Do spot on Dr. Phil’s show. Weep. Win audience sympathy. Sneak into Dr. Phil’s dressing room, get his American Express card number, order one million frankfurters. Take vacation in Tahiti. Plan for next Halloween. k30a |
#2
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OT ~ Halloween chortle
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#3
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OT ~ Halloween chortle
K30a wrote:
The watergardening labradors and I are great fans of author Dean Koontz and his golden retriever, Trixie. Every once and a while Trixie sends around an email letter to remind readers of a new book release. Today's email details Trixie's plans for Halloween. MY HALLOWEEN PLANS By Trixie Koontz, Dog Oh, my, roflol!!!! Trixie's quite the writer! What a great story. Thanks for the giggles, Kathy. -- Zk |
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