I think this just about covers everything (OT - Seasonal greeting)
 

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit my best wishes for an
environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive
gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within
the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice or
secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular
persuasions and/or traditions of other, or their choice not to practice
religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally
successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition
of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without
due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose
contributions to society have helped make England great (not to imply that
England is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only
"England" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed,
colour, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the
wishee.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is
subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no
alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to
actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void
where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the
wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual
application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance
of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is
limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole
discretion of the wisher.

:-)


--
If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs.