GardenBanter.co.uk - Plant Vs Plant (a bit of fun)

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"Draven" wrote in message
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OK.
The site I look after has a field next to it and every year it's full of
nettles.

The nettles make their way through the fence and I have to get rid of
them.

Today I planted some English Mint on my side of the fence.

Who will win the nettles or the mint?

All have a go and I'll report what happens.

Said the right-handed Honeysuckle to the left handed Bindweed
'oh let us get married if our parents don't mind we'd
be loving and inseparable, inextricably entwined we'd
live happily ever after' said the Honeysuckle to the Bindweed.

To the Honeysuckle's parents it came as a shock,
the Bindweeds, they cried, 'are inferior stock,
They're uncultivated, of breeding bereft
We twine to the right and they twine to the left'.

Said the anticlockwise Bindweed to the clockwise Honeysuckle;
'We'd better start saving
Many a mickle mac's a muckle
Then run away on a honeymoon and hope that out luck'll
take a turn for the better', said the Bindweed to the Honeysuckle.

A bee who was passing exclaimed to them then;
'I've said it before and I'll say it again
Consider your offshoots, if offshoots there be,
They'll never receive any blessing from me'.
Poor little sucker, how will it learn
When it is climbing, which way to turn,
Right, Left, what a disgrace
Our it may go straight up and fall flat on its face.

Said the right-hand thread Honeysuckle to the left-hand thread Bindweed
'It seems that against us all fate has combined
Oh my darling, oh my darling
Oh my darling Columbine
thou art lost and gone forever
We shall never intertwine'.

Together they found them, the very next day
They had pulled up their roots and just shrivelled away
Deprived of that freedom for which we must fight
To veer to the left or to veer to the right.

With thanks to Flanders & Swann

:-))

Mike