Jane Ransom wrote:

In article , dave @ stejonda
writes

In message , Mookamoo
writes

Any suggestions on doing a child friendly garden. I want ti do
something a bit more imaginative than paving slabs, but still have a
tight budget.


Paving slabs is child friendly?
Round here they are digging them all up and replacing them by nice
'soft' bark. I should stick to grass if I were you!!

The only child 'friendly' garden I can think of is one that is flat and
covered with a deep layer of sponge:

- You can't have a slope because they might lose their balance and fall
over.

- You can't have any flowers because they attract bees that might sting.

- You can't have any plants of any sort because most plants seem to
have: poisonous, prickly or irritative properties.

- You can't have any trees because a child might climb one and fall out
of it.

- You can't have any structures or they might swing upside down on them,
fall off and split their skulls open.

- You can't have any soil because the neighbours' cats crap in it and a
child might eat it.

- You can't have a pond because they might fall in and drown.

- ad infinitum

And a child would hate a garden like that anyway

For heaven's sake, children like a wilderness that they can play cowboys
and indians in, and Robinson Crusoe and hide and seek and stuff like
that. Don't, what ever you do, make your garden 'safe' or your children
will never develop an instinct for danger. If it never hurts a child to
fall over, it will never develop a proper sense of balance. If they
never fall in a pond they will never learn that ponds are contain horrid
smelly water and contain creepy crawlies like leeches. If they never
climb a tree they will never learn the danger of heights!!!!!!!

When I think of some of the things I did as a child (including catching
snakes in Singapore) I go sweaty all over but I never suffered more than
a few cuts and bruises - children have more sense and resilience than we
give them credit for )



Or oin many cases, theirparents have less.

YIU survived. Arguably these 'brought up on tellytubbies' urbanite kids
should be ritually thrown into ponds to drown unless they prove capable
of aquine locomotion. Sadly the drive of teh urbanite is to turn the
world into a vast suburban sprawwl 'Sfe For Ower ChillDrunAh' which
basically menas that they can eat their crips and far anywhere any time
with all the assurance of a lunatic in a padded cell.

This pamperd, they will then grow up and vote 'Laber' knowing all teh
while that that is their only hope of surviving in a hostlie and
uncaring and incomprehensible world. Get someone else to handel it
whilst they gorge themselves on reality TV.

The only safe garden for a modern kid is the one he sees on 'gardeners
world' whilst safely ensconced in his DHS sofa, drinking his caffeine
rich cola, supping his pot noodle, and scratching his ********. (or
masturbating over Charly Dimmock)