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Old 25-05-2005, 06:54 AM
Dick Adams
 
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Jibby wrote:

Does anyone have any ideas on how to prevent my neighbor's dog from using my
yard as it's own personal toilet? I am disabled and use a power wheelchair
and there is nothing worse than getting dog crap on a wheel (especially
since I can't clean the wheels myself). I don't want to put up a fence, and
speaking to the neighbors about it has been no help.


Oh shit, I forgot my favorite remedy. Buy a bunch of needles and plant
them blunt edge down. Not only will the dog get on in his paw, but if
your asshole neighbor comes over with bare feet of mocassins .....

And one more. Get a pooper scooper and toss the shit onto his deck
or into his pool or better yet right outside his door.

It's unfortunate that traps are illegal. However, if you live in
Florida, you could call your local Rent-a-Gator franchise and put
one of those suckers on a chain leash in your yard. Alligators
are more effective than boa constrictors cause the boa could slither
into your house by accident and then ....

If it's a small dog, you could plant some giant Venus Fly Traps.

There must be a clause in the Americans with Disabilities Act that
will protect you if the owner gets ****ed with you.

Oh before I forget - put some NRA membership stickers where your
neighbor can see them. If fireworks are legal where you live,
you could always throw cherry bombs at the dog.

I am not out of ideas, I'm just tired. Please remember "Do not mention
my name at your trial".

Dick