In article ,
Janet Baraclough wrote:

Pressing a little keyring-sized scanner gadget would cause the lost
handfork to announce its whereabouts. Ideally, the locator-bleep could
be retro-fitted to favourite old brown tools. Further product
development opportunity; how not to lose the keyring-sized scanner in
the garden. The frugal gardener in me says "tie it on string round
neck".

In my case that is followed some considerable time later by someone
else coming up to be and saying "WILL you shut your damn bleeper up?"
and me saying "What bleeper?"

No, no...it's coming to me now.. each garden tool is programmed with
its own phone number. When the spade gets lost, you just call it from
your mobile phone, and make it ring......

It will shortly be mandatory (seriously), but it will be used to
track what you are doing, as evidence for locking you up on
unspecified charges and for targeting your home with huge amounts
of spam selling even gimmickier gardening tat.

Yes, I really DO mean that all items will come with an active RFID
tag, which is effectively the same technology. You have been warned,
so please call me Emmanuel Goldstein.


Regards,
Nick Maclaren.