In article , madgardener
writes
and I am still
determined to rip out every piece of vinca major.

A lovely ramble Maddie - I thoroughly enjoyed it. You don't have to do
all that tugging with Vinca you know, there is a patented and proven way
of removing it without hardly any effort at all.

First of all you put on your gold slippers and ensure you are wearing
your best skirt, when you are at least two inches into mud, yell
(daintily) to your husband to bring a glass of wine whilst you
contemplate the vinca. When your glass of chilled Chardonnay (maybe not
Chardonnay as it can be too caramelly) or Sauvignon Blanc arrives, have
a swift sniff, drink; and carry on contemplating,

Now, to solving the problem, unslurp the gold mules from the clay and
waddle into the garage to fetch some Glychophosphate (Roundup?) or some
that is sold in a gel. Yell, again, discreetly, at long suffering
husband to bring a few sandwich plastic bags out. Pour a little into
the bag, not too much, yell for husband, again; in a ladylike manner and
if that doesn't work, scream and ask why he hadn't the sense to bring
the tags to tie the bag in the first place and deny that it was your
fault that you hadn't asked for them.

Waddle back into the clay and now, with the drying mud on the slippers,
your gait may be a bit unsteady as there is more mud on the middle of
the sole than there is on the heel. Take your small sandwich bag, with
a little goo in it, push as many tendrils into said bag and when it is
bulging, tie it off with the tag - leave for several days or until the
plant dies. It will die and it will take the poison back to its roots.
Do this all over the garden, you don't need to get every shoot as the
root clump will be killed. Make sure you have a pair of surgeon's
gloves on so that you don't get any on your hands, gardening gloves are
too thick and will not allow you to tie up the bag - or was that the
wine?

To conclude, unslurp yourself from the clay or mud, just leave the gold
slipper in the mud if it comes off your foot; I have broken many nails
trying to fish one out and it is much easier just to leave it;
especially if you buy two pairs of identical slippers, you will always
have a spare.

I look forward to hearing that the Vinca is well and truly dead.
--
Judith Lea