A shady word-salad in honor of Groundhog Day:

Groundhog Day Party
================

Dwight Hines: It takes true wordplayers to write about the shades of
mortality. [actual quote]

Random House: shade 7. the disembodied spirit of a dead person.

Walrus: The time has come to chat about eschatology.

Banquo: We thanes know all about thanatology.

Narcissus: What would *you* know about youth in Asia?

Pegasus: Horsefeathers! He probably doesn't know the difference
between Calvary and cavalry. If pigs could fly ...

Beelzebub: ... I'd be lord of the pigs.

Izzy: When should we have this party?

Marmota: Today, on February 2nd, of course.

Elvis: You ain't nuthin' but a Groundhog. -- Cynthia MacGregor

Izzy: But where?

J Maccabee: At the Macabre Caberet. It's an adumbral location for a
dumb brawl.

Izzy: How will we get there?

Dorothy: We can felo-de-sallow brick road.

Toto: Yep.

Izzy: Suffering succotash. Who are you?

Succuba: Men succumb to me. Call me Bella Donna.

Atropos: I'm here. In a reversal of Fate, I give everyone a Sport-ing
chance.

Izzy: Do you cast a die? or just a shadow?

Atropos: of nothing. Life hangs by a Hare...

Grim Reaper: ... that I cut with my scythe.

Tortoise: People say I'm an infernal animal. They confuse me with
Tartarus. If I were a sea turtle I'd be a martyr.

Oyster: Who's going to Host this party?

Izzy: I nominate Walt Quader. Where is that guy?

Quader: The phrase 'dead as a doornail' appears as though it might
be a stubbornly persistent corruption of this disputed fragment from
Shakespeare's otherwise lost notebook of sketches for his (alas, also
lost) last comedy, 'The Grim Knocker': ...dead, Isadore? / Nay!
I'll...
-- Walt

Lobster: Let's dance a quadrille. -- Lewis Carroll

White Rabbit: I can do the bunny hop.

Owl: I prefer the hootchy-kootchy.

Wovoka: Will there really be dancing?

Artemis: Of course. Just call me Diana, goddess of Dance. Do you like
rhythm and blues?

Izzy: Is that a form of synaesthesia? Where tints are produced by
tones?

Silenus: That sounds very interesting. I must tell my friend Memnon
about this. Wonder where he is?

Memnon: I'm luxuriating in LuxOr (aka Karn-ak). I still produce tones
from (furtive glance + whisper) light rays.

DH: The idea of this party is you become familiar with ...

Doppelgänger: ... with your own familiar!

DH: No. Just a time and place where no one takes umbrage ... like
Smartgroup's Word Whirl One ...
http://www.smartgroups.com/groups/wordwhirl
.... where we all try to strike a happy medium.

Witch of Endor: Ouch.

Saul: Are you really a medium?

Witch: I used to be. Now I'm a large. Beware ... the ... evil ... eye.

Cyclops: What is your name?

Odysseus: My name is gnomon. How's that for style?

Ariel: WordPlay? That group is just a tempest in a teapot.

Belial: A worthless group if I ever heard of one. Full of nuts.

Satan: Don't reverse my name in vain.

Vampi Where is that vein?

Azazel: They're as crAzy as 'ell.

Argus: I'd better keep an eye on that group... if only to see if
anyone is actually playing with words.

Humpty: If you can *see* whether I'm playing with words, you've
sharper eyes than most. -- (apologies to) Carroll

Caesar: If looks were daggers, Argus, you'd really be dangerous.

Pluto: Woof. It's He-l in Sheol.

Cerberus: Arf, Bow-Wow, and How. [Israeli dogs say How-How.] I can
fetch three Styx at the same time.

Cynosura: Why is Argus watching me? Does he think I'm Gladly, the
cross-eyed bear?

Euler: You can't cross all 7 of the Koenigsburg bridges without
crossing at least one of them twice.

Caiaphas: Let me try that. I know how to fix a cross.

Valkyrie: Kyrie eleison. Let me carry you away from this Vale of Tears
.... to Elysium.

Izzy: Do they have Shades in Hades?

Satan: You'll find out soon enough. We recycle lemures as lemurs,
douroucoulis, and tarsiers.

Riding Hood: My, what big eyes you have.

Grandma: This has been one long bubbe-maise. It's time to fly the
coop.

Azrael: Dei gratia. By your grace, I'll deliver the coup.

Israel: Just a minute. Una memento mori. Mama MIA. Son of Sam & Sara.

Eli Goodman: Is Izzy schizy?

Dr. Spock: No, just an ex-spook goin' back to 'is old haunts.

CIAo,
Israel "izzy" Cohen