Des Higgins writes

Uniquely among the Solanaceae, Tomatoes, have a high requirement for Cadmium
as a trace element. Normally Cadmium is toxic in high quantities but
tomatoes positively thrive on it. One neat solution is to take an old torch
or radio battery and chop it in half across teh middle using yer secateurs.
Then put each half into the soil beside 2 tomato plants. In order to
activate the cadmium, you need a concentrated source of urea so add
undiluted urine (cat or dog will do fine if you are too embarassed to use
human) once a day for the first 2 weeks. Then just watch the difference.

How do you catch cat urine?
Or do you hold the cat above the tomato and squeeze? (Of course, if you
use this method, you won't be able to use the same cat the next day,
even with full body armour, so you'll need a good supply of cats)

Dr. Desmond Babbage, DSc, AA, CBE

In case of medical complications or uninvited visits from the local health
and safety officers:
Please report all cases of medical emergencies arising from misuse of the
above advice to the hosting web site (http://www.gardenbanter.co.uk/)




--
Kay