K Barrett wrote:
Good one! LOL!! A followup to the cat post (from another NG) is this one,
it can't *really* be true, but I laughed till I cried,

| Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the
| pastor of his church. He had a kitten that climbed
| up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come
| down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc.
|
|
| The kitty would not come down. The tree was not
| sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that
| if he tied a rope to his car and drove away so
| that the tree bent down, he could then reach up and
| get the kitten.
|
|
| He did! All the while, checking his progress in the
| car frequently, he then figured if he went just a
| little bit farther, the tree would be bent
| sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he
| moved a little
| farther forward, the rope broke. The tree went
| boing! and the kitten instantly sailed through the
| air-out of sight.
|
|
| The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the
| neighborhood asking people if they'd seen a little
| kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten. So he
| prayed: "Lord, I just commit this kitten to your
| keeping," and went on about his business.
|
|
| A few days later he was at the grocery store, and
| met one of his church members that lived behind him.
| He happened to look into her shopping cart and was
| amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater
| and everyone knew it, so he asked her, "Why are you
| buying cat food when you hate cats so much?"
|
|
| She replied, "You won't believe this," and told him
| how her little girl had been begging her for a cat,
| but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the
| child had begged again, so the Mom
| finally told her little girl, "Well, if God gives
| you a cat, I'll let you keep it."
|
|
| She told the pastor, "I watched my child go out in
| the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat.
| And really, Pastor, you won't believe this,
| but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly
| came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws
| outspread, and landed right in front of her."


K Barrett

"Ray B" wrote in message
news:7R3Uh.718$xP.324@trnddc04...

I've got a good one for you:

We have a long-haired tabby - Pierce - who likes to go on "walkabout".
One time he was away for 9 months...

He "escaped" the week between Christmas and New Years. We feed him on the
front porch, but he gets freaky when he's outside and appears to be afraid
to come in. The SOB rolls around on the ground looking cute, but bolts if
you make a move to approach him.

I am NOT going to stand for that, so I rigged a simple trap using a steel
milk crate held up with a stick to which a string is attached; food
underneath.

After a few days, I saw him under it, so pulled, but he got away. I reset
it and watched a little TV. About 30 minutes later, now mostly dark, he's
fully under it and I GOT HIM!!!!!

with him howling and yowling, I slipped a piece of plywood under the front
door mat he was trapped on, used bungee cords to hold the crate down, and
my wife and I lifted the whole shebang and brought it indoors.

He's still pitching a fit, clawed the crap out of my shoe, drew blood on
my wife, and before we release him into the house, we realize...

It wasn't our cat.

We traumatized a neighbor's cat and alternated between feeling terrible
and uproarious laughter.

He hasn't come back and eater our cat's food since, and just Sunday, I DID
catch ours.
--

Ray Barkalow - First Rays Orchids - www.firstrays.com
Plants, Supplies. Books, Artwork, and lots of Free Info!


"Wendy7" wrote in message
...

wrote in message
egroups.com...

One of my cats will roll over on command and walks with me to get the
paper and mail at the top of the property. He really likes attention
and he is very smart. The other cat doesn't do anything but vibrate
when I pet it; which is actually sufficient...

My recently deceased (3 years ago) dog, Bam-Bam would sneeze on
command. It was real hoot. Talk about Pavlovian conditioning. She
never did learn to roll over, however and she never took a bus
anywhere.

"Your cat rolls over and your dog sneezes when you tell it to. You
most have a lot of time on your hands."


Ok, I simply couldn't pass on this one........ He is a Dr. Do Little! !
! !
Cheers Wendy




Hysterical - and while I'me reading it, our twenty-two pound ball of
love decides she wants to sit in my lap. She started out tiny, too.