On 31/8/07 14:33, in article , "BAC"
wrote:


"FarmI" ask@itshall be given wrote in message
...
"BAC" wrote in message
"FarmI" ask@itshall be given wrote in message
"BAC" wrote in message
"FarmI" ask@itshall be given wrote in message
"BAC" wrote in message

snip

The mind boggles! I can think of many things I would be very reluctant to
say or do in public, which I have said and done without turning a hair in
private. I bet you can too.

I'm not thinking of pubic scatching here or farting or some such similar
behaviour. We both know that we are writing about what those "supporters"
you mention who have identified something that they find offensive and
which they see in their own minds as being unacceptable behaviour.

They have not necessarily seen something they find offensive or
unacceptable, since that may not be their motivation for contacting a poster
by private e-mail. They may well just empathise with a person for receiving
a tongue lashing they don't think was entirely deserved. Their support may
also be couched in terms of mitigation of the 'offence' of the 'bully', e.g.
'don't take it to heart, old so and so does go off on one every now and
again, but he/she means well and has been a great servant to the group,
etc.'.

The long and the short of it is that if people are allowed to scream, swear,
rant and rave because their gardening advice is corrected, then this group
will disintegrate.
If that sort of behaviour and the things that have been said to me and about
me over the matter of how to plant an oleander is to be tolerated and
considered reasonable as it proliferates - and it will - then we can kiss
urg goodbye because it's in its death throes. Already one outstandingly
valuable contributor no longer posts and another posts very rarely and it is
because of the way Puce has behaved here to people she dislikes. I have
been told that directly. Last time she started on this sort of mud throwing
I said she had brought this group to an all-time low and quite a few people
agreed. So it is up to those of us who want this group to continue to be
enjoyable and to offer help of a high standard, to see that it does so.
There isn't one other person on urg who flies into an outrageous tantrum
just because someone else disagrees with the advice they've given.
When I was corrected the other day for suggesting sheep should be put onto
land to be cleared, I took the correction instantly and didn't feel remotely
tempted to start calling the other posters by a whole raft of insulting
names, involving their age, appearance or families. There is only one
person here who behaves precisely like that and it should not be allowed to
snowball into "oh that's just how she is". Ignore her behaviour for fear of
her disgusting temper and we will get the group we have allowed urg to
become. I'm sorry to pontificate like this but the change in this group over
a year or so is really alarming. snip
--
Sacha
http://www.hillhousenursery.co.uk
South Devon
(remove weeds from address)
'We do not inherit the earth from our ancestors, we borrow it from our
children.'