Rupert (W.Yorkshire) wrote:


I don't often see your posts because they get trashed by some sort of filter
on line lengths.
I am still not certain about the authenticity of this post but all I can say
is that you need to choose your friends very carefully at a vulnerable stage
of your life.
Ignore the advice and offers of support from strangers, which certainly
includes the contributors to this thread. ( me too perhaps).
You are attracting the attention of the odd Looney, who thrives on the sort
of situation you have described..

Best of Luck


sweet Rupert, I understand the problems facing my posts due to the
length of previous postings. I ramble and wax emotional about the
gardens for the last twelve years. The authenticity of the post is who
I am. I write what is happening around me and with me and my life. I am
brutally honest when some around me can't stand how I am. What I wrote
it true. But there are others as I spoke earlier, that have it far
worse than I do. Just facing all these things at the age of 54 when I
had been married for 29 years and was complacent in a life of no
affection and love was too much for me. To give it all up for the real
love and affection of someone who had been a friend for over four years
seems foolish to some, but it's a rare life moment to grab or die with
regrets later on. Yes, I am vulnerable, but more so in regards to just
my needs. Which are huge at the moment.....a place that's affordable, a
job that pays decent....etc. but I am also cautious. I live in a town
where there are no sidewalks, nothing but a flashing traffic light.
Jobs here are available, but the minimum wages here are not enough to
pay enough to provide housing or even rental. I'd have to work three or
four jobs, and the price of gasoline is rising as well. I try and not
let all this get to me, it's just overwhelming and I knew I needed to
let those who have read my posts and knew of my life here in Tennessee
know what was happening in a short way about me. You are sweet to be
concerned, and I appreciate it. Hopefully things will eventually break
and even out and life will begin again with new things to write and talk
gardening about. If I'm attracting the attentions of loonies, well,
they're out there anyway, and what more harm to me than is already in
motion? just keep a good thought and know that what I write is ALWAYS
the truth about things with me (and the gardens). the drought is still
in firm place here in Eastern Tennessee where I live and I'm walking
through each day with positive thoughts.

my love and kind thoughts to you, '

madgardener up on the ridge, back in Faerie Holler, overlooking English
Mountain in Eastern Tennessee, zone 7, Sunset zone 36