OT I've been baned from Tesco
"'Mike'" wrote in message
...
Another Tesco story for you
Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage, a
young
husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large insurance
policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and then arranging
to
have her killed. A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a
nefarious,
dark-side, underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'
Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for snuffing
out
a spouse was £5,000. The husband said he was willing to pay that
amount,
but that he wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his
wife's insurance money. Artie insisted on being paid at least
something up
front, so the man opened his wallet, displaying the single pound coin
that
rested inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to
accept the pound as down payment for the dirty deed.
A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Tesco
store.
There, he surprised her in the produce department and proceeded to
strangle her with his gloved hands. As the poor unsuspecting woman
drew
her last breath and slumped to the floor the manager of the produce
department stumbled unexpectedly onto the murder scene. Unwilling to
leave
any living witnesses behind, Artie had no choice but to strangle the
produce manager as well. However, unknown to Artie, the entire
proceedings
were captured by the hidden security cameras and observed by the
store's
security guard, who immediately called the police.
Artie was caught and arrested before he could even leave the store.
Under
intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the whole
sordid
plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with the hapless
husband who was also quickly arrested.
The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared............
(You're going to hate me for this) scroll down
'ARTIE CHOKES TWO FOR A POUND AT TESCO!'
Lovely
Bill
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