Thanks to all of you who posted such important info in 2003!

Thank god you included me in your quest to inform!
Thanks to all of you:

* I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it's
good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on
a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like shit, but thank god I stopped using deodorant
because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in any parking lot even though I
sometimes have to walk about seven blocks, for fear that
someone might drug me with a perfume sample and then
and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they will
ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill
from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the
estrogen they contain may turn me gay.

* I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because
they are nothing more than horrible mutant freaks with
no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places
like McDonalds can sell their Big Macs.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear
that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine.

* When I go to parties, I now don't look at any girl
no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take my
kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account.
That poor sick girl that was about to die in the hospital.
Funny thing, she never seems to get any older ...

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made, expecting
the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me
when I participated in their special e-mail program.

It's weird, though that my new free cell phone never arrived,
and neither did the passes for my paid vacation to Disneyland.

Amen! Brotha Tom...


"TOM KAN PA" wrote in message
...
Thanks to all of you who posted such important info in 2003!

Thank god you included me in your quest to inform!
Thanks to all of you:

* I stopped drinking Coca-Cola after I found out that it's
good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on
a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like shit, but thank god I stopped using deodorant
because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in any parking lot even though I
sometimes have to walk about seven blocks, for fear that
someone might drug me with a perfume sample and then
and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they will
ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill
from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I stopped consuming several foods for fear that the
estrogen they contain may turn me gay.

* I also stopped eating chicken and hamburgers because
they are nothing more than horrible mutant freaks with
no eyes or feathers that are bred in a lab so that places
like McDonalds can sell their Big Macs.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear
that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine.

* When I go to parties, I now don't look at any girl
no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take my
kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account.
That poor sick girl that was about to die in the hospital.
Funny thing, she never seems to get any older ...

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made, expecting
the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me
when I participated in their special e-mail program.

It's weird, though that my new free cell phone never arrived,
and neither did the passes for my paid vacation to Disneyland.