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THANKS - AND THANKS FOR NOTHING
You sound a little needy, which might be off-putting to some seed recipients. Helen is the very opposite of needy. "Needy" doesn't only mean poor,hard-up. It's also used to describe people who (consciously or not), manipulate other people and social situations in order to support some hidden psychological need of their own. Paghat meant emotionally needy. I knew that, and I meant that she is not any more needy than the rest of us. We *all* manipulate people *all* the time. We pay attention to a spouse/lover so that they will love us, and we won't be alone. We flatter a friend so they'll like us and we'll have someone to talk to. In order to get you have to give. We all have psycological, physical and emotional needs. It's part of being human. She very generously offers to send seeds to people *at her own expense*! If you send to more than a dozen people, that starts to add up to some real $$$. Well, Helen said she had packaged and sent a consignment to over 300 recipients, many abroad.Yes, that's some real $$$; "investing" so much time and money in strangers could mean she's rather emotionally needy in the above sense. As Paghat pointed out, needy behaviour often often makes people shy away. Maybe she's just really nice? I realize that generosity is a dying trait, so it can be difficult to recognize it when you see it. Even nice people will complain when they feel like too many people have taken advantage of them. Interpreting frustration over a lack of manners as needy is a bit of a stretch. There's nothing needy about her behavior - she's venting her anger. What's she supposed to do? People need to be reminded of basic ettiquette sometimes, and some people won't get it unless you hit them upside the head with a clue-by-four. This isn't the first time someone has complained here of a lack of a decent response when sending out items. When we were children we were taguht by our parents to say thank you, but some people seem to think that it's no longer necessary as an adult. All she wants is a simple thank you. Why is that so hard to accept? BP |
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