"Vox Humana" wrote in message
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"paghat" wrote in message
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In article , "Anonny Moose"
wrote:

"Vox Humana" wrote in message
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"Anonny Moose" wrote in message
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You expect us to believe that Dateline NBC get's it's e-mail
service
through Yahoo???

That is EXACTLY what I thought when I read the post.
--
Bill R. (Ohio Valley, U.S.A)

The poster may have been a weirdo posing as more than was credible, but
the topic became an interesting enough thread even so.

When Granny Artemis & I first moved here a few years back, we had one
neighbor, a retired police officer, who would swear very vulgarly at the
top of his lungs in his back yard (usually at his innocuous bulldog), &
became paranoid about the dykes whose house overlooked his. I think he
was
actually suffering small-pecker syndrome & didn't like the idea of butch
girls higher on the hillside than him. For a while, any time he heard us
in the back yard, he'd start cussing loudly at his dog -- obviously
really
for our benifit -- & he would bang on our door to complain about dumb
things, like we got his lawn wet one day with our sprinkler, which we've
been careful never to do again, but sheesh, if he wanted to pay for the
water for our garden I wouldn't complain like that.

For a few months we had endless minor troubles with him, like he'd call
the city on us because the maple tree hung out over the sidewalk (in no
one's way, but the ordinance says it can't hang above the sidewalk lower
than ten feet or some such, & this was a little lower). Part of me
wanted
to kick his ass & show him what it's like to have an asshole for a
neighbor, but on second thought I decided I was just going to be nice to
him no matter how big an ass he was. Over time he's become less & less
intrusive & paranoid about our presence & has even come close to seeming
like a nice guy. He has a nice dog at least, & I try to always feel that
anyone with a sweet playful elderly dog can't be all bad.

If we'd continued to play his game of butcher-than-you which got him off
on the wrong foot with us, it could've escalated into an endless feud,
but
I just couldn't stand the idea of maintaining a dislike for someone I
was
going to be living next door to for a long while. I prefer to reserve my
strongest dislike for nazis, rapists, & child molesters, & not not waste
negativity on some lonely old fart thumping his chest at me.

One day the guy just told me "You better be scared of me" in an outright
threat. I responded by calling him a "weird old coot -- the kind I like"
&
forced a big hug on him. Completely flabberghasted him, & from that day
on, he stopped trying to be a nuisance. And it was much less work to be
nice to him than to maintain a pointless grudge; even if I might've been
able to justify being as rude as he used to be, that just takes a lot
out
of a body, whereas undermining his hostility with a sudden hug was kind
of
amusing & not at all draining to have done.

It may have been dishonest to hug him & say I liked weird old coots,
because I in no way liked him at that moment. But it seemed better to
pretend fondness than to see if I could be more obnoxious than he was
being. And I think the gambit ended up making life better for all
concerned. Tempting though it was to "prove" to him he can't push us
around, that just didn't seem like as rewarding a route as striving for
peace. So I try at the very least to give a friendly wave every time
he's
in eye-shot, & a few times we've ended up in actual rational
conversations
about gardening, with no references to his behavior that first year we
were here, & no need on my part for him to own up to having been such a
jerk.

I'm sure there are exceptional cases where no degree of reason or
decency
would win over a bad-egg neighbor. But I bet in 99% of cases, it takes
two
to tango, & even IF one of the two players was closer to "right" or
"justified" in maintaining hostilities, it's still just two hard-headed
fools in a ****ing contest, & in most cases it's going to pay off better
to be gentlehearted even in the face of someone's aggression, unless
endless escalations over nothing-worth-a-fight is what one really is
after.


I can relate to this, as the person I had in mind as my redneck neighbor
was
a small-town police officer until recently. He has two boys about 12 and
14
who have an attitude problem. When ever there is some transgression, the
father gets all puffed up like some blow fish and reminds everyone that he
was a police office - like that's suppose to mean something. The kids
were
pointing some sort of gun (paint ball, bb, etc) at a small girl recently.
When the parents approached him and told them that hey didn't want his
kids
pointing guns at their daughter (age 7) he told them that his kids could
point guns at anyone they wanted. His kids were riding their motor
scooters
through our lawn last week so I told them to stay on the sidewalk. A few
minutes later, big daddy pufffish drove his big-ass truck six houses down
the street to tell us that his kids could do what ever they wanted, once
again telling us that he had been a police office. He made some snide
reference to us being gay. We laughed at him and told him to go home. We
had already called the police because we knew there was a possibility of
some trouble with the moron. The police saw the kids running stop signs
and
menacing small kids and told the father to keep them under control. I'm
sure we won't ever be friends, but the kids have stayed away and that is
the
best we could hope for.



My asshole neighbors haven't the guts to give us a hard time. They act as if
they are ignoring us and give us the cold shoulder. We always smile and say
hello but they quickly turn away without response. This has been going on
for three years. And why? Well, we wanted to keep our dogs on our property
and their dogs on theirs, so we put up a fence. The fence of THEIR choice,
mind you - as long as they contributed to the cost, which they did. But that
wasn't our only reason. The boundary needed to be established for other
reasons (like protecting our property! They ripped out, without talking to
us, eight trees they thought were on the property line - that turned out to
be well within OUR side of the line. We might have established that if
they'd told us their plan). But apparently they thought we didn't have
legitimate need for a fence - despite the fact that one of their dogs
attacked five people on OUR property, at different times, without regard for
our concerns or complaints, and despite the fact that their dogs were taking
their morning dump in MY yard and they weren't cleaning it up, and despite
the fact that we'd spent thousands of $$ fencing in the other boundary lines
to keep our dogs off the rather busy road that fronts our properties and
they were able to get out from THEIR yard.

Karen