"Chris Bacon" wrote in message
...
michael adams wrote:
"Chris Bacon" wrote...
di7ip wrote:

They aren't pals. Find them, and smash them to bits, a large
forged steel hammer is just about adequate [...]

My wife never listens to a word I say, or treats everything I
say with utter contempt, and laughs behind my back.

My children never listen to a word I say, or treat everything I
say with utter contempt, and laugh behind my back.

My boss never listens to a word I say, or treats everything I
say with utter contempt, and laughs behind my back.

My colleagues at work never listen to a word I say, or treat
everything I say with utter contempt, and laugh behind my back.

My mates down the pub never listen to a word I say, or treat
everything I say with utter contempt, and laugh behind my back.

My cat wakes itself from slumber and immediately leaves any room
that I happen to walk into.

My dog stops wagging his tail at the very sound of my approach.

But Hey - don't get mad get even !

That's bad luck, Mr. Adams. I hope your situation resolves itself
in due course, the above must mean a great deal to you. Perhaps you
take things too seriously?


Try smashing up some snails with a hammer !

Good idea. Buy a big hammer. If you can't swing it, buy a body-
building course.

Apologies to you if I've mis-read your intent, by the way!


Sorry Chris there's no use pretending. As I said above, nobody
listens to a word I say, they just laugh behind my back. Just
like you're laughing right now with that "apology" of yours. You
see Chris, you're really no different from all the rest I'm afraid.

So there's no point in me stopping now, as nothing will bring
them all back. The killing will just have to go on.

Like a lot of people of course I'd like to move up to the bigger
stuff, torturing and killing animals, even offing the odd relative
or two maybe, but the doctors have told me that that stuff can get me
locked up. So for the time being at least, I'll just have to stick to
the legal stuff instead. Pulling the legs off of spiders, smashing
snails to bits with a hammer, trapping and killing squirrels and other
"pests" etc. etc. In that way I can pass myself off as normal, and
nobody, apart from the doctors, need ever know my little secret. Up
until now at least.

Not that anyone will understand a word of this of course, as I say.



michael adams

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